Your current ENT is wrong. There are several cases on this forum of styloid regrowth & subsequent follow-up surgeries. Here is a post made by Ear_Mom that will be helpful for your case:
This case involved her young teenage son who initially had his styloids removed to the skull base & yet they regrew. There are other adults on this site who’ve had regrowth but several of those only had their styloids shortened not fully removed to the skull base. Ear_Mom has written a book - Connecting the Dots - which chronicles her son’s health journey. It’s a quick read & very informational. It’s available on Amazon.
Swollen lymph nodes & even local neck swelling are not typical ES symptoms but are also not unheard of. Scar tissue is a possibility but a CT scan to check for styloid regrowth would answer the BIG question.